‘How do you work together as a couple to get everything done?’, is a question my husband, David, and I get asked a lot. The answer is simple, really. In fact, it’s hidden in the question.
With Father’s Day coming up, I want to take some time to focus on what David brings to the party, and to thank him for it. Because, although some people think Father’s Day is just another ‘Hallmark holiday’, to me it’s an important day on the calendar to thank the father in our household for everything he does.
Being a dad to six kids can’t be a walk in the park. Recently, I gazed across the kitchen at him, one child hanging off his leg and another calling out, ‘Hey dad, water please,’ and I felt compelled to ask, ‘Dave, what’s it like being a dad to six children?’
He looked up at me, leaning on the bench, exhausted from a full day of work. ‘Piece of cake,’ he scoffed. I laughed. It really is full-on.
According to my husband, being a dad to six kids is not easy but it’s worth every plate he has spinning!
We often joke that having six kids is the same as having two. But let’s get real for a second. It’s six. And some days, it REALLLYYYY feels like six. More than the number of fingers on one hand! More than the number of little monkeys jumping on the bed! My husband and I were outnumbered three children ago!
David works forty plus hours a week. Not to mention extra hours spent on home renovations, chores, fun and down time. And then, of course, I need his attention too…and I’m needy! His plate is full. Really full.
Despite this, he gets up early so I can sleep in. He puts the kids to bed so I can use the time to write. He takes Tuesday off every week and puts his parenting pants on for the whole day so I can cram in 20 hours of work!
These are the ways he shows me that we’re in this together; that ours is a partnership.
What makes him so amazing is despite his huge workload, he appreciates that my plate is just as full and he never forgets to ask, ‘How can I support you?’
I’m so grateful David understands that essentially there is no difference between my work and his work. We might have different job titles, work different hours and carry out different tasks, but the importance of our work is the same for both of us. The effort we put into it and the pride we take in it is the same.
And I’m grateful that in our household, parenting is fifty-fifty. I appreciate everything Dave does for me and for our (not so little) family.
So, for us, the key to working together as a couple and supporting one another is to ask. Ask what the other needs; ask how the other is coping. The fact that we remember to ask when we’re already giving our all, when our buckets are empty—yet we still ask how we can support one another—is what makes us a real team.
You’re an amazing father and I want to wish you the most wonderful Father’s Day.
Here’s to you: six kids, a job, and you still make me feel like we are a bloody kick-arse team!
Definition of ‘killing it’ is YOU.
Love your teammate
Written by Krechelle Carter. Mum of six children, six and under; freelance writer for publications such as Kidspot and Woman’s Day; blogger; and creator of the Eight at Home community. Strong believer in following your dreams and balancing it all…most of the time! Find her at eightathome.com.au, on Instagram and Facebook.